Misc.

I want one of these.

To the Dakotas: It's spring. Did you get the memo?

Text messages to interpret your dog's barking. Clue to dogowner: if your dog is locked in the kennel and barking incessantly, it's frustrated. If you have food in your hand, it's either saying "Food! Yay! Food!" or "Okay, idiot. Drop the doggie treat right now, or I'm going to bite you in the crotch. No, I do not want to sit. Are you serious? Okay, fine. This is soo freaking humiliating."

But I can think of an entertaining use for this technology: simultaneous text translation of pickup-bar speak. "I'll call you." becomes "Come on, close the car door. It's two am. You're drunk and won't remember my name tomorrow." "Nice earrings." becomes "But does that hooker know you stole her clothes?" Oh, and could you imagine if you made one of these into a bedside radio, and . . . . Nah, way too cruel.