Wednesday, May 03, 2006

More Things I've Learned on the Internet Lately

Without the amazing power of the 'net, I'd never have known the following:

Coffee made from beans that are found in the feces of a civet is considered gourmet. ("What do you do for a living?" "I finger through civet poop looking for beans.")

Some men will do anything to get you to come up to their room and lick their goods.

How to make flaming Jello shots.

Birds know grammar. ("No, g*dammit. How many times do I have to say it? "Does Polly want a cracker?" Can't you grasp the simple fact that a complete sentence requires an auxiliary verb?")

Where to get the template for a Motion to Wear Cowboy Hat in Court.

The meaning of life is Jewelry.

The Star Spangled Banner has been translated into binary code. The ramifications are still being discussed.

Without the 'net, I also wouldn't have these lovely images running around in my brain:

"I now pronounce you man and . . . . . . . incoming!!!!"

"Remember, remember the Fifth of November, Garbage can treason and plot. . . . "

Guerilla knitters.

Fred Flintstone taking a drag.

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